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Monday, June 4, 2012

Dealing With Their Son

 Dealing With Their Son
by: Kiitty-chan

Sakura, Sasuke, and their five year old son, Kenny, are sitting on a bench waiting for their car to be fixed. Sakura looked anxious. Sasuke had a bored expression on his face, and Kenny was tapping his figure on the bench impatiently.
"Mommy, I'm thirsty!" Kenny whined.
Sakura sighed. "Kenny, there's a machine over there." Sakura said, pointing at the drink machine. Kenny looked confused; he had never used a machine before.


Sakura sighed again. She got up and started walking with Kenny. "Sasuke-kun, are you coming?" Sakura asked, looking back at her husband.
"Hn," Sasuke grunted.
Sakura and Kenny walked over to the drink machine. Sakura showed her son how to use it while he kept saying, "Ah." Or "I see." Trying to sound smart.
So Kenny got a plastic cup and got some water by pressing the button. He did that ten times until finally, the water container ran out.
A big man walked over to the drink machine with a big mug. He pressed the tea button. Kenny looked confused. He had thought that the man pressed the water button. He also wondered where he got the big mug.
"Ecuse me sir, but where did you get that mug?" Kenny asked.
"In the staff room," the man replied.
"Ah, and where is that located?" Kenny asked trying to sound convincing. He thought the machine only worked with big mugs now.
"You don't work here." The man said in a rude tone.
"Yes I do!" Kenny lied.
"If you're a staff, then you would know where the staff room was." The man said, glaring at poor little Kenny.
"..."
"..."
"So where is the staff room located?" Kenny asked again.
'Wow this kid is stupid!' The man thought.

Sakura was watching her son talk to the stranger. "Hey Sasuke-kun, do you think that ma-
"No Sakura, he wouldn't hurt Kenny, because if he did, he would have to deal with you." Sasuke said, cutting her off.
Sakura glared. "He would have to deal with you too."
"Hn,"
"Bastard." Sakura muttered.

The man started walking away, ignoring Kenny's question. "Fine, don't answer me mister deep voice!" Kenny shouted.

"No..." Sakura said slapping her hand on her forehand.
"...Hn,"
"Seriously Sasuke,"
"Hn."
"What did you say?"
"I said, fine, mister deep voice!" Kenny shouted again.
"Hey, at least my voice doesn't sound like a little girl. Who's you're dad? A fag?" The said in a mocking tone, then laughed.
"Ok now it's on!" Sasuke hissed.
"You are one selfish bastard."
"Hn," Sasuke grunted.
"Well don't just sit there, go beat that guy up!" Sakura yelled.
Sasuke and Sakura walked over to their son. Sasuke was glaring at the man, with his famous death glare. And Sakura was cracking her knuckles while smirking evilly
"I'm not a fag!" Sasuke hissed.
"Wait, you're his dad? But you're Sasuke Uchiha, one of the toughest guys around." The man stammered. Then he started laughing. "Who did you marry, a dumb slut?" The man laughed.
Sakura pushed Sasuke aside. "What did you call me?" Sakura growled.
"It ok mommy and daddy. I can handle this." Kenny said, pushing his parents aside.
"No it's not ok. Nobody calls my wife a dumb slut. That would ruin the Uchiha name!" Sasuke hissed.
"The Uchiha name, is that the only reason you're mad?" Sakura asked in an angry tone.
And so, Sasuke and Sakura walked back arguing with each other.

"Now, where were we?" Kenny asked. "Oh yea! Well at least I'm not fat!"
"Look who's talking?" The man said chuckling.
"Ecuse me? I am not fat. I am just averagely round." Kenny said, nodding.
"Ecuse- I mean, excuse me? Why are you here anyways?" The man said glaring.
"Oh, I'm here to get a drink!" Kenny exclaimed.
The man got a cup and filled it with hot tea."Here."
"Fine your highness, with a fat highny." Kenny glared.
The man blinked. "And why were looking?" He asked.
"..."
"..."
"Just give me my damn water?" Kenny hissed, and then he gasped. "I said a bad word."
The man gave Kenny his 'water' then left muttering bad words.
"Sasuke... do you think Kenny's unusual?" Sakura asked in an anxious tone.
Sasuke snorted. "He's an Uchiha." Sasuke said proudly.
"But sometimes... never mind." Sakura muttered.
Kenny stood there for a while.
He stood there for another minute.
Until he finally realized that it was hot tea. "Ow, ow, this water is hoooooooot!" Kenny yelled stretching out hot like he meant it was hot.
Sakura gasped. She dragged Sasuke with her ready to confront her son. "Kenny, you think the water is hot?" Sakura asked in an anxious tone. (she didn't know it was tea)
"No mommy, I think it's very hoooot!"
"Does water turn you on?" Sakura asked looking like she was about to have a heart attack.
Sasuke was standing behind her with an emotionless face but inside... 'No, imposible, my son is turned on by water?'
"Well, it does help me go with the flow." Kenny said while making wave motions with his hand.
Sakura almost fainted.
"Hey, why is my water green?" Kenny asked, confused.
"Green?" Sakura asked. She took the cup from him."Kenny this is tea and it's pretty hot." Sakura said.
"What?" Sasuke hissed
"No, I mean, it's hot tea, not hot." Sakura explained.
Oh, so where's my water?" Kenny asked, confused.
"And you still don't think he's unusual?" Sakura whispered to Sasuke.
"Hn. Maybe we got Naruto's kid." Sasuke whispered back.
"But he looks exactly like you."
"Hn,"

Their car was fixed and everything was ok.
"Mommy, are we in the car?" Kenny asked.
Sakura turned to look at her odd son. "Yes dear, we're in the car." Sakura answered while Sasuke drove.
There was silence.
"Mommy, are we in the car?" Kenny asked again?"
"Are you sure we got the right baby?" Sasuke asked.
"Sasuke!" Sakura scolded.
"Are we in the car?" Kenny asked for the third time.
Sakura got annoyed. "No Kenny, we're in a tractor!" Sakura said sarcastically
"Oh cool! Are we going a farm?" Kenny asked.
Now she was getting really annoyed. "Yes Kenny, you'll fit right in with the pigs."
"What's that suppose to mean?" Kenny asked.
"It means-
It means you're fat!" Sasuke said, cutting Sakura off.
"Ecuse me? For the last time, I'm not fat, I'm just averagely round!" Kenny exclaimed.
"Kenny, what do you think round means... and it's not ecuse me, it's excuse me" Sakura said.
"It means skinny." Kenny said.
"Where the hell did you get skinny out of round?" Sakura asked.
"Round means skinny." Kenny said
"...Maybe he's the dope." Sasuke muttered.
"Where did we go wrong?" Sakura whispered.
"We could sneak into the Dope's house and steal his ba-
"Don't even think about it!" Sakura exclaimed.
Silence,
More silence.
"Are we in the car?"
Sasuke and Sakura groaned.

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