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Icha-Icha Time

Disclaimer : Masashi Kishimoto

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Icha-Icha Time

written by sasunaruislove

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'Sebatang pohon menjadi sangat berarti untuk Kakashi, mengapa?'

Hari liburnya adalah hari paling menyenangkan untuk Kakashi Hatake. Bukan karena hari itu adalah tanggal merah untuknya dan tak perlu mengerjakan misi. Namun hari dimana ia bisa membaca buku Icha-icha tanpa ada murid yang menunggunya di arena latihan. Setidaknya, ia bisa tenang membacanya seharian tanpa beban. Ini adalah hari dimana ia bisa mendalami Icha-Icha dan menyelami maknanya lebih dalam *setidaknya, begitulah pikir Kakashi*.

Seperti saat ini, Kakashi tengah membaca seri Icha-Icha Paradise di kamarnya. Ia membuka jendela kamar, dan duduk di dekatnya sehingga ia bisa merasakan angin pagi musim semi yang dingin dan sejuk. Kakinya ia selonjorkan, kepalanya ditopang bantalan kursi yang empuk, sungguh nikmat.

"Ho ho.." gumam Kakashi ketika membaca bagian romantis di dalamnya, kemudian wajahnya memerah ketika membaca bagian 'mesum'. "Jiraiya sungguh berbakat, sung.."

"BRAKK!"

Kakashi refleks mendelik kaget ketika seseorang mendobrak pintunya dan muncul seperti polisi yang akan menangkap buronannya. Orang yang membuat wanita geli karena tampilannya yang luar biasa.. norak! Lelaki ini memakai spandex hijau ketat dan gaya rambut seperti tempurung kelapa yang ditempelkan di kepalanya. Ia muncul dengan senyum lebar dan pose seperti Ksatria Baja Hitam.

"YEAH!" Teriak Gai, ia mendekati Kakashi dan meninju udara. "KAKASHI! AYO KITA BERTANDING!"

"Heh?"

"INI ADALAH PAGI YANG CERAH! KITA HARUS MEMOMPA SEMANGAT DAN JIWA MUDA KITA DENGAN BEROLAH RAGA! SEKARANG ADALAH WAKTU YANG PALING TEPAT UNTUK MEMBUKTIKAN SIAPA YANG LEBIH HEBAT DI ANTARA KITA BERDUA!" teriak Gai lagi, ia berbicara seperti pejuang kemerdekaan yang akan perang.

"Bagaimana kalau besok saja Gai, aku sedang sibuk," kata Kakashi malas-malasan.

Gai tidak bicara lagi, ia mendekati Kakashi hingga jarak mereka sejengkal saja, ia kemudian mengambil ancang-ancang dan..

"HYAAAATT!" Gai meninju Kakashi dengan gerakan cepat, Kakashi mendelik kaget dan melompat secepat kilat sehingga Gai mengenai kursi yang diduduki Kakashi sampai hancur.

"G.. Gai! Gai! Tunggu dulu!" Kakashi mengangkat tangannya pertanda ia tidak mau bertanding, tetapi Gai tampak tidak peduli. Ia kembali mengambil ancang-ancang.

"CIAAAATT!" Gai menendang wajah Kakashi dan mengenai tembok kamar Kakashi, Kakashi sudah lebih dulu melompat ke jendela dan berniat kabur dari Gai.

"Kita ketemu besok saja Gai!" kata Kakashi, ia menghilang dengan bunyi "Poff" yang keras dan meninggalkan Gai dengan semangat yang masih berkobar-kobar.

Kakashi melompat dari atap satu ke atap lain untuk mencari tempat yang bagus untuk membaca dengan tenang sekaligus tidak diketahui oleh Gai. Kakashi tahu betul sifat Gai, ia tidak akan menyerah selama mereka belum benar-benar bertanding. Ia tidak akan keberatan diajak bertanding, tapi tidak hari ini! Ini adalah hari yang langka dalam hidupnya.

Kakashi menatap kedai Ichikaru dan mengamatinya, ternyata masih sepi. Ia bisa numpang baca disana.

"Yosh!" Kakashi menyapa pemilik kedai. "Aku pesan 1 ramen,"

"Wah pagi sekali," kata pemilik kedai.

"Ya, aku sudah lapar," kata Kakashi. "Oh ya, boleh aku membaca disini?"

"Tentu saja Kakashi, kau boleh membaca disini kapan saja,"

"Hehe.. Arigatou!" kata Kakashi, ia memilih kursi paling pojok dan kembali tenggelam dalam bukunya. Akhirnya, Gai tidak akan tahu ia kesini. Dia pasti akan mencarinya di menara atau rumah Naruto.

"Benar kau mau mentraktir?" kata sebuah suara yang familiar di telinga Kakashi.

"Tentu saja! Memangnya aku pernah bohong?" kata suara lain.

"Kenapa tidak mengajak yang lain juga?"

"Soalnya mereka sibuk! Baka!"

"Aku mau ramen porsi super!" kata suara yang lain lagi.

"Huh, merepotkan.."

"Selamat datang," kata pemilik Ichikaru.

"Selamat pagi paman! Kami mau makan disini!" kata anak laki-laki berambut pirang ceria, ia kemudian menoleh ke arah Kakashi. "Kakashi-sensei!"

Kakashi menoleh dan menatap 4 anak yang sangat dikenalnya.

"Oh, ternyata Naruto, Ino, Shikamaru dan Chouji," kata Kakashi. "Tumben ramai-ramai kesini?"

"Ino berniat mentraktir kami," kata Naruto, ia mengambil tempat duduk di sebelah Kakashi.

"Kau sendiri tumben sekali makan ramen?" kata Ino.

"Sedang ingin saja," kata Kakashi tersenyum, ia lalu kembali menekuni bukunya.

"Silahkan," kata pemilik Ichikaru, ia menghidangkan 4 porsi Ichikaru.

"Wah! Mantap!" kata Naruto, ia langsung memakan ramennya dengan lahap. Begitu juga dengan Ino, Chouji dan Shikamaru.

"Seandainya saja Sakura-chan dan Teme ada disini, pasti lebih asyik," kata Naruto.

"Memangnya mereka kemana sih? Dasar jidat lebar itu!"

"Tidak tahu, kalau Teme biasanya sih latihan,"

"Jangan-jangan mereka berkencan?" kata Ino. "Awas saja kalau si jidat lebar itu berani.."

"Hn.. Tidak mungkin," kata Shikamaru. "memangnya sejak kapan si Sasuke itu punya selera yang bagus?"

"Dia punya selera yang bagus, makanya dia tidak memilih Jidat lebar!" kata Ino. "Dia pasti akan memilihku!"

"Hoaaah.. Merepotkan," kata Shikamaru, ia menyandarkan kepalanya ke meja Ichikaru dan tidak bicara lagi.

"Rasanya tibak bungkin Sasuke membilihmbu," kata Chouji sambil terus menjejalkan ramen ke mulutnya.

"Apa kau bilang?"

"Hey! Kenapa kalian terus membicarakannya sih?" protes Naruto.

"Kau yang mulai duluan!"

"Aku mau tambah!" teriak Chouji.

"Tambah lagi?" kata Naruto.

"Memangnya kenapa? Ino saja tidak keberatan! Iya kan Ino?"

"Yeah.. Makan saja sepuasmu," kata Ino cuek, ia kelihatannya masih sibuk memikirkan Sasuke dan Sakura.

"Memangnya kau tidak kenyang?"

"Aku masih lapar!" kata Chouji, akhirnya Naruto menyerah dan menggumam sendiri.

"Dasar gendut,"

Cling! Mata Chouji berkilat mendengar kata 'gendut' dan seketika menatap Naruto dengan pandangan 'siap makan'. Ia meletakkan sumpitnya dan memusatkan perhatian hanya pada Naruto.

"Kau bilang apa tadi?"

Naruto menelan ludahnya dan berkeringat dingin, sementara Ino dan Shikamaru menatap Chouji dengan pandangan 'Oh tidak!'.

"A.. Aku tidak bilang apa-apa," kata Naruto.

"Kau tadi bilang aku GENDUT! AKU AKAN MENGGILASMU NARUTO! HIAAATTT!"

Kakashi berjalan lunglai ke arah Timur, ia sudah cukup repot menghindari Gai dan baru saja melawan bola raksasa yang susah dijinakkan. Chouji seperti badak liar yang senang menyeruduk apa saja, dan ia hampir saja menghancurkan seluruh bangunan Ichikaru seandainya Kakashi dan yang lain tidak berhasil menenangkannya. Dan berita terburuknya adalah, ia tidak mungkin bisa membaca lagi disana setelah kejadian barusan. Setidaknya, Kakashi harus mencari tempat baru untuk menyelesaikan membaca. Tanpa Gai, tanpa keributan.

"Huh?" Kakashi menatap pohon apel yang besar dan melompat ke atas pohon. Ia tersenyum lega dan memposisikan dirinya di tempat paling nyaman. Akhirnya, ketenangan, dan ia bisa kembali membaca Icha-Ichanya.

"BUG!"

Kakashi mengangkat wajahnya, sepertinya ia mendengar sesuatu barusan.

"BUG! BUG!"

Kakashi menoleh ke bawah, ia hampir saja melompat kaget ketika melihat sesuatu di bawahnya.

Di bawah sana, ada makhluk berspandex hijau ketat dengan alis tebal dan potongan rambut ala Changcuters tengah menatapnya! Yang membuat Kakashi tidak jadi melompat adalah karena makhluk itu ternyata memiliki DNA yang berbeda dari yang ditakutinya. Yang ini memiliki wajah yang lebih muda dan alis yang lebih tebal. Kakashi memandangnya dan menghela napas lega.

"Rock Lee, sejak kapan kau ada disini?" tanya Kakashi.

"YOSH KAKASHI SENSEI!" Lee berteriak antusias menyapa Kakashi. "SAYA BARU SAJA MELATIH KAKI DAN TANGAN SAYA DENGAN POHON DI HUTAN INI! SAYA BARU MENCOBA SETENGAH DARI LAHAN DI HUTAN DAN BERNIAT MENCOBA SEMUANYA!"

Kakashi melongo memandangnya.

"Kau berniat memukuli semua pohon di hutan ini?"

"YA! SAYA HARUS MENYELESAIKANNYA DALAM SATU HARI!"

Kakashi mengelus dada dan turun dari pohon dengan hati merana, bahkan di tengah hutan ia masih saja tidak tenang.

"Hoi Lee," kata Kakashi. "Apa kau yang merobohkan pohon-pohon itu?"

Kakashi menunjuk beberapa pohon yang tumbang.

"YA! ITU SAYA!"

Kakashi menghela napas berat dan memutuskan akan pindah tempat saja.

"Hati-hati berjalan Kakashi Sensei!" kata Lee. "Banyak lubang jebakan,"

"Yosh! Terima kasih sudah memberi tahu,"

Kakashi melompat-lompat di atas atap sambil mengawasi keadaan, ketika terlihat sosok lelaki berspandex ketat, Kakashi mengambil jalan lain ke selatan. Ia akhirnya menemukan rumah Sasuke yang luas dan mampir. Ia mengetuk rumah Sasuke dan mendapati wajah datar Sasuke ketika muridnya itu membuka pintu rumahnya.

"Halo Sasuke!" Kakashi tersenyum ramah.

"Kakashi Sensei, ada apa?"

"Cuma ingin numpang baca," kata Kakashi. "Kau tumben tidak latihan?"

"Aku baru saja selesai," kata Sasuke.

"Oh begitu,"

"Ya begitu,"

"...?X!"

"..."

"..." Kakashi tersenyum kaku. "Hehe.. Boleh aku masuk?"

"Silahkan,"

Kakashi sudah sepuluh menit duduk di pojok ruang tamu Sasuke, Sasuke memang pilihan paling tepat untuknya saat ini. Dia tidak banyak bicara dan cukup sopan untuk tidak menelantarkan tamunya, Sasuke bahkan memberinya setoples kue dan secangkir teh. Kemudian meninggalkan Kakashi sendirian untuk membaca dengan tenang.

Anak baik, batin Kakashi.

"Konichiwa!"

Kakashi menangkap satu suara familiar lagi, kali ini ia tak akan mengindahkannya.

Terdengar langkah Sasuke ke pintu depan dan suara pintu yang berderit terbuka.

"Konichiwa Sasuke-kun!"

"Hn,"

"Aku membawakanmu jus tomat,"

"Masuk saja," kata Sasuke.

Kemudian terdengar langkah-langkah senang di lantai kayu. "Loh? Ada Kakashi Sensei,"

"Halo Sakura," Kakashi menyapa tanpa mengangkat wajahnya.

"Kenapa kau ada disini?"

"Cuma kebetulan mampir," kata Kakashi. Sakura tidak bertanya lagi ketika Kakashi terlihat tak ingin diganggu, jadi Sakura langsung duduk di sofa Sasuke.

Sakura memang pengertian, batin Kakashi.

"Yoo TEMEE! KAU ADA DI DALAM?"

Sakura bangkit dan membuka pintu depan.

"Kenapa teriak-teriak Naruto?" kata Sakura.

"Waa.. Sakura-chan! Kenapa kau ada disini? Kau dan Teme tidak.."

"Jangan bicara lagi!"

"Kalau begitu aku masuk saja," kata Naruto, ia menoleh dan menatap Kakashi.

"Halo Naruto!" Kakashi berkata cepat sebelum Naruto sempat bertanya. "Aku cuma mampir sebentar, kalian lakukan saja apa yang akan kalian lakukan,"

Naruto menggaruk kepalanya yang tidak gatal dengan bingung.

"Jangan mengganggunya Naruto!" kata Sakura. "Kurasa kita hanya harus.. Ya ampun Sasuke-kun! Kau membawakan kami jus tomat, aku membuatnya untukmu. Kenapa kau menghidangkannya pada kami juga?"

"Ewwh.. Teme! Kau suka jus tomat?" Naruto berkata tidak minat.

"Makanya aku memberimu ini Dobe!" Sasuke meletakkan segelas air putih di meja, Naruto tampak sakit hati.

"Kau memberi Kakashi Sensei dan Sakura-chan minuman enak, kenapa kau cuma memberiku air putih?"

Sasuke tidak berkata apa-apa dan hanya meneguk jus tomatnya sendiri.

"Sudahlah Naruto, Sasuke-kun sedang kehabisan bahan makanan dan minuman, lagipula air putih kan juga sehat,"

"Iya, iya," kata Naruto.

Kakashi berusaha berkonsentrasi pada tulisan yang tercetak di buku, tapi fokusnya berkali-kali disela oleh suara-suara yang datang dari Naruto dan Sakura. Mereka terus saja berbicara dan berdebat mengenai hal apa saja. Kakashi memicingkan matanya dan membaca baris-baris katanya.

-wanita berambut merah itu- "APA YANG KAU LAKUKAN NARUTO?"

-bertemu lelaki tinggi de- "YA AMPUN SAKURA-CHAN!"

-terlibat obrolan seru d- "Dobe!"

-d.. dan saling bercerita tent- "JANGAN IKUT CAMPUR TEME! DAN JANGAN PANGGIL AKU DOBE!"

-pekerjaannya adalah seorang akunt..- "Dobe!"

-di Kyoto-"KAU TEME!"

-namun ibunya meninggal setelah melahir- "JANGAN MEMANDANGKU BEGITU TEME! ATAU AKU AKAN.."

"Yosh kalian bertiga!" Kakashi akhirnya menyela perdebatan mereka, ia memandang mereka dengan frustasi. Ia bangkit dan menepuk-nepuk celananya.

"Aku pergi dulu," kata Kakashi.

"Memangnya ada ap.."

"POOFF!"

Kakashi menghilang dengan bunyi keras meninggalkan 3 murid kesayangannya.

Kakashi hampir putus asa berjalan mencari tempat tenang untuk membaca dan berpikir, apa sebaiknya ia membaca di neraka saja?

Kakashi berjalan kemana saja dan tidak peduli ia akan kemana, kalau perlu ia akan membaca di dalam sumur kering.

"RIVALKU KAKASHI!"

Kakashi menengok terlalu cepat pada sumber suara sehingga lehernya sakit.

Ia tidak sempat bereaksi lebih jauh selain berlari secepat ia bisa.

"HOI!" Gai berteriak di antara keramaian dan berlari cepat sekali mengejar Kakashi. Saking cepatnya, Gai menabrak pedagang buah yang ada di pinggir jalan. Ia sampai terjungkal dan jatuh bersama apel dan buah-buahan lain.

Pedagang buah meringis kesakitan dan mendelik pada Gai, jelas menunjukkan ketidaksukaannya.

"MAAFKAN SAYA!" Gai berteriak lantang, ia bergerak cepat untuk mengumpulkan buah-buahan itu kembali ke tempatnya. Setelah semua beres, Gai bangkit dan mengedipkan sebelah matanya, ia mengangkat jempolnya dan meringis memamerkan gigi putihnya pada penjual buah.

"SUDAH BERES! KALAU KAU BUTUH APA-APA LAGI, PANGGIL SAJA SAYA!" teriak Gai, ia kemudian mengedipkan sebelah matanya lagi dan pergi.

"YEAH! Aku akan memanggilmu!" kata penjual buah. "KALAU AKU PERLU ORANG SINTING!"

Kakashi berlari terus, ia berkali-kali mencoba menyamarkan diri dengan menyamar sebagai orang lain. Ia menyamar sebagai Neji yang tengah duduk di sebuah emperan toko dan pura-pura tidak memperhatikan Gai yang sangat mencolok.

Kakashi menelan ludahnya ketika Gai berhenti dan memandangnya lekat-lekat.

"Aku tahu itu KAU KAKASHI!" Gai berteriak antusias. "TIDAK MUNGKIN NEJI HYUUGA MEMEGANG BUKU ICHA-ICHA!"

Kakashi kaget dan menyadari kesalahannya, ia kemudian berlari secepat ia bisa dan berusaha keras agar tidak tertangkap oleh Gai.

"AKU ANGGAP ITU SEBAGAI TANTANGAN KAKASHI!"

Dan mereka terus berlari dan memainkan petak umpet yang selalu berakhir dengan keberhasilan Gai menemukan Kakashi, sampai sore menjelang, akhirnya Kakashi hampir kehabisan tenaganya.

Ia lagi-lagi terjebak di hutan yang sudah ia kunjungi pagi tadi. Ketika ia berjalan lebih dalam ke tengah hutan, ia berniat mencari pohon lagi. Meskipun kemungkinan besar akan ditemukan oleh Gai. Ketika ia tengah mengatur napasnya yang ngos-ngosan, tiba-tiba terdengar sebuah gemuruh yang berbunyi aneh.

Kakashi mendelik ketika sebuah pohon besar melayang ke arahnya dan menabraknya sampai ia terlempar dan jatuh ke tanah, anehnya tanah itu amblas ketika tertimpa tubuhnya. Kakashi terjatuh lebih dalam ke dalam tanah, ia mengusap punggungnya dan meringis kesakitan. Dari mana datangnya segelondong pohon itu? Ia menatap ke atas, dan menyadari dirinya jatuh ke dalam lubang jebakan. Dan lubang itu tertutup oleh segelondong pohon yang tadi menabraknya, menyisakan sedikit lubang untuk cahaya masuk. Tiba-tiba Kakashi meringis senang, ia menepuk-nepuk bajunya dan duduk di atas tanah. Menyandarkan tubuhnya dengan santai dan membuka buku berwarna oranye dan mulai membaca.

"GYAAA! Demi Gai Sensei dan jiwa mudanya! Aku berhasil memukul satu pohon sampai tercerabut dari akar-akarnya!"

Picture Collection (NEW)

TRAGEDI DI TENGAH HUJAN

Disclaimer:I don't own Naruto

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TRAGEDI DI TENGAH HUJAN

written by sasunaruislove

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Summary:Naruto dan Sasuke kebasahan karena mereka kehujanan, mereka berlindung di gubuk tua di dekat sungai. Mereka melepaskan pakaian mereka, untuk mengeringkan pakaian mereka, dan tiba2 Sasuke mendekati Naruto dan …. Apa yang dilakukan Sasuke? Apakah mereka terus di gubuk tua itu?

Warning: Cerita ini bukan buatan uzuchi. Yang buat temenku yang karena males buat account jadi cerita buatan dia ini 'dititip' di account aku. Biasalah, pemalas. -.-'

AN:Ini Fanfic pertama yang kubuat disini. Jadi gomen nasai -.- kalo aneh dan gak nyambung! Sebenarnya gak rela sih Naru jadi ma Sasuke. Banyak yang bikin fanfic tentang SasuNaru. Tapi tetep gak rela. Tapi fanfic watashi malah Tentang SasuNaru. He he he -!

Dresssssssssss

"Sasuke hujan! Gimana nih!"

teriak Naruto sambil berlari ditengah2 hujan.

"Disitu ada gubuk. Ayo kita berteduh!" ajak Sasuke sambil menarik Naruto.

DRAP DRAP DRAP

Meraka berdua berlari mendekati gubuk tua itu. Mereka memasuki gubuk itu. Lalu mereka melepaskan baju tersebut untuk dikeringkan.

"Naruto, kau manis sekali…." Ucap Sasuke sambil mendekati Naruto.

"Hah! Sasuke, kau bicara apa sih ! kau mengigau ya?" teriak Naru

"Naruto, aku menyukaimu!" ucap Sasuke

Sasuke langsung mencium Naru, 1, 2, 3 dan ke 4. dileher. Dibibir dan pikirin aja ndiri.

"Sasuke apa yang kau lakukan!" teriak Naru

"Naru aku menyukaimu" Sasuke memeluk Naru dengan sangat kuat. Sambil membuka baju Naru.

"SAASSSUUUUKEEEE ! PLAKK" Naru menampar Sasuke, dan langsung pergi meninggalkan Sasuke sendirian.

"SASUKE BODOOHHH" teriak Naru. kenapa dia begitu, memang kami sudah pacaran tapi…

Esoknya …..

Tap tap tap

"Naruchan… gomen nasai. Naruchan maaf ya ya ya ya….. . ." Ucap Sasuke.

"Sasuke kenapa kau selalu membututiku sih! Kau penggemarku ya?"gerutu Naru.

"Naruchan, aku belikan ramen yang banyak deh! Jadi maafkan aku ya soal kemarin itu?" mohon Sasuke.

"Hah ramen! Ng… gak.. aku gak mau dibayar sama makanan! Pokoknya gak mau! curang ramen jadi pancingannya!"gerutu Naru.

"Naruchan RAMEN RAMEN RAMEN masa gak mau"

"aku pingin ramen tapi… gak gak gak gak mauuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!"teriak Naru

"Naruto! Apa yang harus kulakukan supaya kamu tidak marah!" harap Sasuke

"AKU MAU KITA PUTUS!" teriak Naru

"Hah!" trakkkk brukkk Sasuke jatuh seperti kepingan kaca pecah.

"Pokoknya aku benci Sasuke!"

"…."Jlebbbbbbbbbbbbbbb

"Sasuke kau dimana!" mencari Sasuke.

"Hei Naruto! Apa yang akulakukan pada Sasuke!"Tanya Nejisan.

"Hah, apa! Aku malah mencari Sasuke, kau tau dimana Sasuke? Nejisan" Tanya Naru

"Kau itu bakadobe ya! Itu dibawahmu kau injak siapa!" ucap Nejisan.

"Hah! SASUKE!" melihat kebawah.

"Naruchan jangan bilang kau minta putus…. Hiks3x. Ya tuhan, aku mohon tolonglah akuuuuuuuuuuu….. jangan biarkan Naruchanku meninggalkanku…" ucap Sasuke sambil memegang kaki Naru yang ingin pergi.

"Sasuke lepaskan aku!" ucap Naru

"….."

"SASUKE LEPASKAN AKU!" teriak Naru. "Kenapa sih kau selalu saja begini Sasuke kau hanya memikirkan dirimu sendiri, dan selalu saja ingin …. Seperti tadi malam. AKU TIDAK TERIMA!" ucap Naru.

"Naruchannnnhiks3x"

"AKU BENCI SASUKE!" teriak Naru sambil meninggalkan Sasuke.

"Sasuke, apa kau tidak apa-apa?" Tanya Nejisan.

"…"

"Sasuke?" Tanya Nejisan

"Neji kau teman baikku kan!"

"Hah!... Sasuke ap….."

RENDAN!

UGHHHHHHHH.

KATON!

WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

CHIDORI

AAAAAAAAAAAAA…CROTHH….

"Terima kasih Nejisan" plok plok (sampil menepokkan tangannya). "Mudah-mudahan kau diterima disinya".

tap tap tap

(kasihan Neji….. dia telungkup dengan terbanjir oleh darahnya sendiri…. . Dasar Sasuke dia sebagai teman saat dia sedang kesal saja. Itu sama saja dengan menjadi korban keganasannya)

TAP TAP TAP

"Halo my baka otoutouuuuuuuuuu!"ucap Itachi. "Kita sudah lama tidak bertemu!" ucap Itachi.

"ANIKIIIIIIIIIIII! Aku sedang kesal jadiii ! "bentak Sasuke.

"Sasuke, kenapa kau marah padaku! Kau sedang marahan ya sama Naruchan! Hehehe. Kayak aku dong sama Nejisan baik2 saja."

"ANIKI AKU INGIN SEKALI MEMBUNUHMU."

"Sasuke jangan. Kita ini masih saudara aku mohon ya…"

"ANIKIIIIIII!, aku punya kabar baik untukmu. Tunanganmu Nejisan sudah kubunuh jadi sebaiknya kau menyusul dia ke akhirat! Hehehe" sasuke tertawa licik.

"Sasuke apa yang kau lakukan pada Nejisan ku! Tidak kumohon kau berbohong. Kau tidak membunuhnyakan! Aku kan belum melakukan itu…. Ituuuu dan ituu…."

"HEHEHE"

ZRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTTTTTTTTT.

"Sasuke kau tidak ingin membunuhkan?"

"Aniki apa kau punya permintaan terakhir!"

"Kumohon, jangan bunuh Itachi kakakmu ini (sambil memohon dengan berlutut)"

Chidoriii

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

"Ya, tuhan pertemukan aku dengan Nejisan" harap Itachi pada detik2 sebelum ia….

(apakah Itachi-san mati? Apa yang sebenarnya terjadi? Jawabannya entar ada dibelakang. Hehehe)

tap tap tap

"Siapa itu? Hei tolong dia tuh, cowok itu seperti mau matii?" kata pejalan kaki.

"" teriak Sasuke.

PRANG

PRANG

BRUK

TAK

TEK

BRUK.

"Ah…. Naruchan! Naruchan….plok" Sasuke mendekati.

"Sasuke…. Kau kenapa?" jawab Naru

"Naruchan jangan bilang kalau kita putus. Kita sudah 3 hari tidak ketemu" kata Sasuke.

"Sasuke, itu sudah tak usah dibahas lagii. Aku dan kau tidak akan bisa nyambung. Aku sudah jadian dengan Orochisama" jawab Naruchan.

"Naruuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu"

Hah hah hah

hanya mimpi, untung itu hanya mimpi! Tapi aku sudah 3 hari tidak bertemu dengan Naruchanku. Tapi kenapa harus jadian dengan Orochi. Mimpi yang buruk….

"Aku harus mencari Naruchan"

…

Tok tok tok

"Sensei Tsunade, ada Naruchan?" Tanya Sasuke.

"Naruchan, dia tadi bersama Orochi dibelakang"

"HAH! OROCHI! tidak itu tidak mungkin! Masa mimpiku jadi kenyataan!"

drap drap drap

"Naruchan!"teriak Sasuke.

"Sasuke! Ngapain kemari?" kata Naru

"Hai, Sasuke lama tak bertemu!" ucap Orochi.

Grep (sampil memegang leher Orochi) "Untuk apa kau kemari! Jangan bilang kau akan mengambil Naruchan dariku!" marah Sasuke.

"Wooiiiiiiiiiii, dengarkan aku. Jangan langsung mencekekku!"

"Tidak ada ampun kalau ada yang mengambil Naruchan dariku!"

"NARUCHAN ITU HANYA MAU KONSULTASI PADAKU!" teriak Orochi sebelum napasnya habis karena cekikkan Sasuke

sretttttttttt.

"Hah hah hah. Mati dah gw" ucap Orochi.

"Untuk apa kau konsultasi pada orang bodoh ini Naruchan?" Tanya Sasuke.

"Aku ingin tau kenapa selalu saja Sasuke ingin melakukan itu….." jawab Naru.

"Ah itu. Naru maafkan Sasuke mu ini. Aku janji tidak akan mengulanginya. Jadi aku mohon kau tidak bilang kalau kita putus" ucap Sasuke.

"Naruchan juga sebenarnya gak mau putus sama Sasuke! Tapi Sasuke harus janji jangan melakukan itu lagiii" ucap Naru.

"Ya, aku janji…"jawab Sasuke.

"Naruchan jangan percaya sama Sasuke! Mendingan jadi pacarku saja!" kata Orochi.

BUK

"Ayo Naru. Kita rayakan kebersamaan kita ini dengan makan..."

"RAMEN AKU MAU RAMEN" ucap Naru bersemangat.

"Ya, aku tau kok!" jawab Sasuke.

"Irasshaimase….."ucap pelayan toko Ramen.

"Aku mau makan ramen yang banyak!" ucap Naru.

"Iya iya"

tak… (ramen sudah datang)

"Itadakimasu" ucap Naru.

" Ayo. Mari makan !" jawab Sasuke.

Srup sruputt Srupuutt

(tau ah gak ngerti bunyi orang makan Ramen! Hehehe)

beberapa menit kemudian tepatnya 15 menit dari atas.

"Ayo kita pulang!" ajak Sasuke.

"Ayo…."

Tik tik

Tes tes tes

Dresssssssss (ni suara ujan lagii loh)

"Naru ayo kita berlindung dibawah pohon itu!" ajak Sasuke.

"Ayo"

"Ng….. Naruchan aku… aku….."

"Ada apa?" Tanya Naru.

Cup. Sasuke mencium 1, 2, 3, 4 dan…. Tiba2 menggerayapi tubuh Naru.

"SASUKE! PLAKKKKKKKKKKKKKK"

(ya seperti itulah sikap Sasuke yang tidak akan pernah berubah sampai kapanpun. Oh ya jawaban tadi yang "Apa Itachisan mati? Apa yang akan terjadi?". Itachisan gak matii kok dia malah senang babak belur ditindas sama baka otoutou…. Permintaan terakhirnya dikabulkan. Karna)

"Nejisan2. Aku senang kita bisa berduaan di rumah sakit ini!" ucap Itachi.

"Itachi. Peluk aku didepan banyak orang" ucap Nejisan.

"ah biarin saja. Untung saja kita sekamar aku kan bisa melakukan yang aku inginkan…" ucap Itachi.

"Kau itu berisik! Aku khan jadi maluu" ucap Neji

"Ya walaupun kaki dan tangan kita tidak bisa bergerak. Aku akan selalu bersamamu" ucap Itachi.

"Iya iya. Tapi sampai kapan begini terus. Sasuke….." teriak Nejisan.

(Itachi sih malah seneng karena mereka berdua sekamar. Sedang Nejisan mikir. Bila dia jadi kakak iparnya apa dia akan dibantai. Hahhhhhhhhhhhhhh…)

Don't Forget The Sunblock

Disclaimer:I don't own Naruto

---

Don't Forget The Sunblock

written by Rikku9314

---

"I told you to put sun block on, but would you listen?" Tenten sighed exasperatedly as she poured some more oil on her hands.






"Hn," Neji replied, cringing slightly as Tenten placed her hands on his back, rubbing the aloe over his very red shoulders.

"You Hyugas think you're just so invincible that you forget the basics," she said, rolling her eyes slightly as she closed the bottle and stood up, stretching her arms up over her head. She turned behind her and handed her teammate his shirt, smirking slightly as he winced when he put it on.

"I on the other hand put on SPF of 50 and look at my nice wonderful tan!" She held out her copper arms, admiring them and grinning as she held them up for her sunburned companion to see. He glared at her slightly.

"Okay Tenten, point proven, next time we carry watermelons for 3 hours I'll remember to put on sun screen." He stood up off the bench they had been sitting on and he and Tenten began walking in the direction of the park where the rest of their friends were busy decorating for the party that night.

"Well that and at least wear a shirt or something," Tenten laughed as she walked beside him. She sighed and looked up. It was a perfect last day of summer; not a cloud in the sky, not a breath of wind and easily 25 degrees above. Tomorrow would be the first day of fall and she was sure that nature would take advantage of that fact and the weather would instantly cool and cloud over.

The loud booming voice of their teammate reached the couple's ears minutes before they saw his signature green jump suit bouncing around the area that Team Kakashi had taken over in the park for their BBQ. Ino and Sakura were hanging up multi-colored Chinese lanterns between trees while Hinata placed candles inside them, ready to be lit for when the sun set. Chouji was standing at the BBQ, but who had set him to the task of preparing the meat was beyond Tenten as he kept glancing around before surreptitiously placing a few pieces in his mouth. A few feet away Sai sat a table, looking up occasionally from the scroll that was spread out before him and then drawing his brush across the parchment. Kiba chuckled next to Shino as Lee, Naruto and Akamaru ran around in circles chasing each other. A few meters away, Shikamaru shot the loud group an annoyed look and returned to his cloud gazing.

As Neji and Tenten approached the group Lee broke off from the romping and dashed over to his two teammates.

"There you are my youthful companions! You are tardy, and the watermelons have yet to be cut!" he bellowed at them, gesturing at the pile of watermelon the team had picked, including the one Lee has chosen that was half his height. Tenten put her hands on her hips and glared at him.

"Well if the watermelon needs to be cut so badly why don't YOU do it, Lee?" she accused as she heaved a watermelon over to the long table that Sai was sitting at. She grabbed the nearby knife that Sakura had brought and began slicing the watermelon into perfect triangular slices, her deft weapons hands doing what they did best.

"Because, oh flower of our team, I did not want you to miss out on the chance to train!" he screamed before running back to the hyperactive blonde boy and ninja dog. Tenten rolled her eyes at them as she went back to grab another watermelon.

"Cause you know, cutting watermelon is just so strenuous…" she said under her breath.

"Apparently it is, Tenten," said Sakura as she walked towards her friend, the lanterns all hung. "Why else would Neji just stand there and not help you?" Tenten looked up from the watermelon to see Neji shifting uncomfortably and adjusting his shirt. She grinned at him shrewdly as he gave her a look that clearly said "don't you dare".

"Oh, well that's just because Neji has a rash," she said, smiling, as she cut into the soft innards of the melon, juices pooling onto the table.

"It is NOT a rash," Neji replied, glaring at her as their friends all snickered around him. He held his chin up and went to grab the watermelon Lee had picked out, but not without making a face that plainly showed he was in pain.

"Suuure, it's not…," Sakura said, walking over to help Hinata mix the punch.

Neji shot Tenten an evil look as he too began to help cut the watermelon with the weapons mistress who was obviously enjoying herself, if only a little too much.

"It is actually, and it's highly contagious as well, just ask Tenten," he said coolly, smirking to himself as Tenten looked up, horrified. Then she narrowed her eyes and leaned over and whispered to him softly so that no one else could hear.

"Next time you'd better listen to me," she said. "Hey Lee! Come over here! Don't you think Neji is doing such a YOUTHFUL job of cutting up this watermelon?" Lee enthusiastically ran over to examine his friend's handiwork.

"Oh yes, Tenten! It is simply beautiful and so youthful!" Lee said, giving his teammate the thumbs up sign.

"I thought so too. Don't you think he deserves a pat on the back?" She smiled sweetly at Neji as his eyes widened in sudden fear.

"But of course!" And with that Lee slapped Neji on the back and ran back to join the frolicking once more.

Neji stood straight as a board in silence, tears welling in his eyes, as Tenten hummed happily to herself.

Getting Ready

Disclaimer:I don't own Naruto

---

Getting Ready

written by Rikku9314

---

Neji paced silently across the simple, barely furnished living room of his team mate's apartment, his suit beginning to wrinkle from being folded in the same places as he walked around. Why did girls always take so long to get ready? Tenten had gone into the bathroom nearly an hour ago and she had yet to emerge. Occasionally he would hear her cluttering around in the small room doing who knew what.

"Hah..." Neji sighed impatiently. He stopped pacing and looked up as he heard the familiar creak of a door being opened.

"Neji, are you being impatient again?" Tenten teased, giving him that adorable look that made him want to wrap her up in his arms.

"...Hn," he replied as he walked over to the slender kunoichi, still dressed in her bathrobe. "You know the awards ceremony for you becoming jounin will be OVER before we get there if you take much longer," he ridiculed.

"Oh, be patient, Neji! All I need to do is get dressed!" She pushed Neji out the door to the bathroom and slammed it shut in his face. Neji tried to hide a smile on his face. Tenten was so cute when she was angry he thought.

He sighed once more and walked over to the small armchair in her living room to wait. He had just begun to daydream when he heard a sharp shriek and the sound of something hitting the ground. He jumped up from his seat and raced to the bathroom door where he flung it open.

Tenten lay huddled on the floor; her legs sprawled out from under her, her hands clutching a red dress. A smooth pool of water was puddled around her, evidently showing that she had slipped on dripping bath water. Next to her lay a fuzzy pink bathrobe.

"Hah! Neji!" Tenten screamed at him before flailing around for her bathrobe to cover herself up.

But Neji had already slammed the door shut and had his hand held up to his nose to stop the trail of blood that began trickling down to the floor.

Naruto MP3 Collection (part 2)

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Before you download, you must understand that those MP3 from another source.
Many thanks to DILANDAU for the MP3.

1. U can do it domino - naruto shippuden MP3

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2. Naruto ending - Naruto shippuden MP3

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3. long kiss goodbye - naruto shippuden MP3

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4. harmonia - Naruto MP3

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5. Rapppe of naruto - Naruto (outside naruto/naruto fans) MP3

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6. toshiro masuda - Naruto MP3

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7. yura yura - Naruto MP3

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8. Naruto (pianist - sad memories) - Naruto MP3

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9. You are my friend - Naruto Shippuden MP3

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10. Naruto shippuden opening MP3

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11. Kishidan / naruto shippuden ending omae dattanda - Naruto (sasuke the kid) - MP3

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Scary Movies Suck!

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.

0—Scary Movies Suck—0

0—Written by sKyLaR KnIgHt—0

Sasuke wasn't surprised when he saw that their meeting place was deserted with the exception of Hinata. Sure, he "invited" their whole class, but he had made sure to go around uninviting them whenever the Hyuuga wasn't around. It was his way of indirectly asking her out on a date, which she had agreed to when everyone else did. Why'd he go through all that trouble? Because, though he liked the kind female, he knew that she would never make the first move, and he couldn't directly ask her out because it went against everything he stood for: Uchihas don't ask the women; the women asked the Uchihas. Thus, this indirect date with just the two of them…

Lavender orbs flicked up from their spot on the ground when she had heard the faint shuffle of shoes on the pavement and a hint of relief flashed through her eyes. "Sasuke-san!" She climbed to her feet and slowly made her way over with a small smile, pulling the ends of her sleeves further down in habit. "I was beginning to think that I came at the wrong time."

His lips twitched as he tried to contain his smile. She was simply too cute for her own good at times. Not to mention how pretty she looked in casual clothes, wearing a purple with black striped sweater with bunny ears on her hood. She wore semi-baggy jeans and topped it all off with black and white Converse. "Hello, Hinata-san. Have you seen anyone around since you've been here?" He knew that the answer would be no, but he felt that this whole thing would be a little more believable if he just went along with what he was leading her to believe.

"Iie…I wonder where everyone is…" She murmured, glancing around them with a cute pout. "Maybe there's another party that we aren't aware of."

The crafty Uchiha glanced down at his watch pointedly and released an exaggerated sigh. "The movie is going to start in fifteen minutes and we still need to go and get some seats."

"Oh, no." Hinata bit her lower lip and glanced around them once more before slowly tilting her head back to stare up at him uncertainly. "Ano…Should we just reschedule?"

Sasuke genuinely frowned at the thought after going through so much work to get her alone, but kept himself from stomping his feet like a petulant child. Instead he managed to mask his features to that of disappointment. "I really wanted to see this movie and this is its last week that it's showing."

"A-Ah!" The Hyuuga straightened considerably. "Well we could…ano…if you'd like…" She fidgeted under his gaze of veiled amusement, a cherry complexion slowly engulfing her entire face. "M-Maybe we could go see it together...If it is that important to you…"

A small genuine smile made its way to his face, lighting up his dark features considerably. He ignored the collective gasp of all those surrounding them and focused entirely on the female before him. "Well then, we should get going." He stuffed his hands into his pockets and turned around, going back in the direction that he had originally came from, ensuring himself that she was by his side the entire time. I knew that this was my best idea yet. He smirked under the shield of his bangs, angling his head away from her as a precaution. And the movie that we're going to watch is full of killers and carnage, so she should be clinging to me the entire time.

He was in the middle of mentally congratulating himself when the sudden exclamation from his companion broke through. "Ah! Shikamaru-kun, we're over here!" His head snapped up in surprise when he saw the short teen beside him wave modestly to the slouching lean male who slowly made his way to their side after a few short strides, thanks to his height.

"Yo." The ponytailed male reached into his pocket and pulled out a pocket knife with an embroidered hawk design on the side. "Here Sasuke, my kaa-san said that it would be rude to come here without something so I found this." He extended to the male, holding it there for a few moments as the raven haired male stared him down with a look that described infallible loathing.

"Oh no! I didn't even think to bring a gift!" Hinata groaned, pulling the Uchiha's attention away from the unwanted addition to what was supposed to be his birthday date. "I'm such a horrible friend!" Her lovely lavender hues flicked up to meet his steady coal gaze, wholly apologetic. "I know! How about I bring you something special to eat on Monday?"

"Sounds good." He responded politely before once more turning his attention to the classroom shirker. "Glad someone else could make it." He bit out, though he really didn't mean it; in fact, he wanted to yell at the lazy teen to go back to whatever bed he crawled out of that morning and leave them be, but that would just completely ruin all of the progress that he might have or still will make with Hinata.

"Hai. I remembered hearing you inviting everyone to the newest scary movie, so I decided that maybe it was worth waking up earlier."

Earlier? Sasuke thought, glancing up at the sky where the sun was already well past the noon mark. "Well…" His gaze flicked from the Nara to the Hyuuga, nodding. He could make this work. The chances of Shikamaru falling asleep during the movie were exponentially high, so Hinata and he were as good as alone it may have not came out exactly as he had planned, but the outcome would be a given, Hinata would be his girlfriend by the end of the day.

He plastered on his trademark smirk and nodded towards them. "Well let's get going then, the movie's starting in a few minutes."

0—Break—0

"Oh my goodness, that movie was the scariest that I've ever seen." Hinata uttered softly as they made their way towards the train station that evening, her hands going to her chest as her eyes slid this way and that, jumping at every noise that sounded nearby.

"It wasn't that bad." Shikamaru commented, his brows flying up when he felt a burning sensation at the back of his head. He glanced behind himself and his classmate, blinking tiredly when he noticed that it was only Sasuke. Weird. Where's all this killer intent coming from? He wondered before turning back around carelessly.

Sasuke, however, seemed to care. He was practically seething by the end of the movie, because not only had the Nara not gone through with what his very nature prodded him to do, but it was him that Hinata clung to! How could she turn to a guy like him, he thought giving the ponytailed teen a disgusted look over, over someone like me? Sure, the Nara wasn't the ugliest thing in the world, but he was Sasuke Freaking Uchiha! Women would eat their own hands just for the chance of getting it on with him, and he wasn't even looking for sex here! He actually wanted to have a relationship with her!

But he…Sasuke growled, sending the Nara more waves of killer intent. He got in the way! He followed the conversing teens into the train station, stopping short when a new thought occurred to him. I can still be the one to walk her home! "Ne, Hinata-san, I'll walk you home. It's pretty late, and I'm sure that you're still tense from the movie."

"Oh, arigato Sasuke-san, but it isn't necessary." The female smiled sweetly, standing in front of her platform, while Shikamaru lingered in the background.

"I insist. I wouldn't be much of a gentleman if I let you walk these streets at night, now would I?" He paused for effect before really laying it on thick, giving her the sexiest smile he could muster. "Come on, Hinata-san, I won't bite."

Her face exploded in red almost immediately, her hands shooting up to fidget just as the train that she needed to catch parked itself in front of her, the doors opening swiftly. "A-Ano…It really i-isn't necessary. S-Shikamaru-kun lives half a block a-away, so he said that h-he'd walk me home." She hastily walked onboard and gave him a short bow through the window, Shikamaru trudging in behind her.

Maybe the Nara wasn't exactly entirely awake, but he could've sworn that the last thing that the Uchiha did before their train pulled out of the station was start jumping up and down like a monkey with a positively infuriated expression. Huh…Maybe he didn't like the pocket knife…

The Rules of Engagement

Disclaimer:I don't own Naruto because if I did, there would be some consistency with the story and Zombie Itachi would start a revolution.

Warning: Language, Suggestive Situations
Timeline:AU

---

The Rules of Engagement

written by IceHaze

---

"Why the hell am I watching this?"

His fingers moved along the keyboard, furiously typing in his desired words. Naruto was usually a fairly vexing person who engaged in fairly vexing actions. At times, they bordered outright insanity but the present situation proved that perhaps his best friend needed much more medical attention than previously thought. Before suggesting he admit himself into a psychiatric rehabilitation center, Sasuke waited patiently for Naruto's reply. The box popped up with a light meowing sound; his friend had responded to his message.

Isn't it funny?

Sasuke grunted and replied back instantly.

Idiot. I don't know why you're watching videos like this, but stop sending them to me!

He growled lightly when his friend responded with a string of characters that indicated he found the whole idea hilarious. Sasuke, however, was not amused and his friend picked up on it despite his absence in the room.

I can hear you growl all the way from here. Come on. It's pretty funny. And if you must know, Kiba sent me this video so I'm not entirely a pervert.

He didn't agree at all. Watching two German Shepherds mating feverishly was not only disgusting in his eyes, but pointless as well. What kind of person posted footage of such a thing? They weren't even breeders or informants providing educational programming for animal enthusiasts and other potential breeders. They were just some immature brats recording footage as they passed along witnessing the spectacle. It was obvious from the snickering and laughter he caught in the background.

Did you watch it all the way? The ending's funny. Especially when they get tied and…

"Yes, Sasuke. Did you watch it all the way?"

Sasuke moved fast in an attempt to click on another video but was stopped by his brother's firm hand on the mouse.

"Ah. There's nothing like two dogs going at it on a sunny afternoon in the middle of a crowded park."

He blushed. "Naruto sent me that video." He typed in a quick message to his friend that his brother arrived and logged off the messaging program.

"Of course he did."

"I wouldn't purposely watch such a stupid thing."

"Sasuke, you're eighteen. It's only natural you would get curious…or develop such strange fetishes."

"Fuck you."

Itachi chuckled deeply as he sat on his bed, casually glancing over at the computer screen. "But Naruto is right. The ending is rather amusing, especially when the owner comes to reclaim his female. He throws quite a tantrum over the event. "

Sasuke raised an eyebrow. "You've…seen this video?"

"Yes."

"Maybe you're the pervert."

"Actually, I was looking up some videos on flowers that girls would like. My girlfriend and I, as you know, were in a fight. Someone suggested I get her a bouquet, looked through several videos and noticed that dog video in the recommendations. I got curious and watched it. After sitting through it all, I decided to follow the dog's advice, so I went over to her dorm room and proceeded to screw her senseless. And so you see Sasuke, you can gain much needed wisdom from these videos. They're quite informative."

"Shut up."

"Although, I'm curious as to how the schematics for the recommended videos work, since I never get anything remotely relevant to what I'm watching. For instance, the other day I was watching a special on the construction of Taipei and then get referred over to a man lighting his rear end on fire. I'm not quite sure how to bridge the gap between the two subjects."

"Look, I don't want to hear it. Just tell me why you're here."

"Mother's been calling you. Dinner is served. And in the future, if you don't want your older brother gaining more pieces of blackmail, which I assure you I will be using eventually, then please lock your door."

"Fine. Tell her I'm coming down. Now get out."

"As you wish, little brother."

He hoped the subject would end. It wasn't the first time he was caught in embarrassing situations by Itachi, nor was it the first time Naruto sent him some idiotic video to watch. Usually the subject would end and another video playlist would be sent his way. But he knew the matter was not going to be dropped anytime soon when the next day at school, Naruto had decided to open his big mouth in the cafeteria.

"You know, I can't look at Sakura-chan anymore without thinking of those two dogs humping each other."

He choked on a tomato wedge. "What?"

"Well, I mean, ever since I saw that video, all I can think about is how weird it is for dogs. I mean, a male dog can just go up to any female on the street, do her and then leave without getting in trouble. When you think about it, dogs have it pretty cool."

"Are you suggesting that a society governed by hormonal driven males with no morality or sense of restraint, taking women against their will in public and detaching themselves from any responsibility for the consequences of their actions and the outcome of their quick bout of intercourse is of sound mind?"

"Well, when you put it that way, I guess not."

"As usual—a moron."

"Shut up. I was just thinking it'd be cool to just have sex without worrying about how right or wrong it is. I mean that female dog didn't look like she was upset about the whole situation. I didn't see her trying to get away."

"That's just one instance. In anyway, humans are different from dogs. We have emotional needs as well, especially women. And another thing, that female can't file a lawsuit for statutory rape like humans can. Do you know what they do to guys like that in the joint?"

Naruto cringed. "Yeah, I know. But what's with you, anyway? Are you some kind of advocate for women?"

"I just have logic, idiot. Besides, only weak men show off how horny they are in public. Have some class and show some restraint and dignity. You disgrace males around."

"Well excuse me for behaving like a normal teenage boy!"

They both glared into empty space, angrily chewing on the remnants of their food. But as the female in question passed by them both and offered a small smile, they began to chew faster and look in another direction. She giggled at their actions and continued on down the path to dispose her tray of food.

"Man, Sakura-chan is really hot, isn't she? Especially in those clothes. I am so grateful the school uniform makes girls wear skirts."

Sasuke's eyes unconsciously watched her as she placed her tray on the conveyor belt. She frowned when she dropped part of her trash and bent down to pick it.

"It's just like what that dog did in the video. And then the other dog came up to mount her."

"Moron, she's just picking up some napkins. That's no reason to get excited." But he had to admit, he was finding the lower part of her body very attractive.

"Look, there's Kiba! He's going right by her. I bet he's planning on mounting her."

"Will you shut the hell up? He's just talking to her." He frowned when he noticed her responding enthusiastically to, most likely, some stupid joke. He frowned even more when a couple of other guys joined the conversation.

"I'm getting pissed just looking at them talk. Hey! That's what happened in the video too! There were a bunch of dogs that smelled the female in heat. Then they all started fighting for her until one of the Shepherds won the fight. Do you think that's what's going on now? It would explain why so many of the guys are hanging around her. Maybe she's in heat."

"For the last fucking time, we're not damn dogs! And if you can't shut the hell up about that video, then you can eat by yourself." He stood up with his tray and walked away from the table.

"Hey great idea! We can go over there and fight them."

"Moron. You're doing this just to aggravate me, aren't you? You don't actually believe any of this is linked to human behavior, do you?"

He chuckled. "Well, maybe not all of it. But you have to admit, men act more like dogs then woman do. I mean, how many female dogs go around lifting their tails and begging the male to mount them?"

"All of them. That's how the mating ritual starts. The female lets the male know she's interested in mating. The male takes it from there."

"And that's how it is in real life for us too! The girls come onto us and flirt and we just go from there!"

"Just shut up, please."

He did remain silent as they approached the group of people that was walking right past them and out of the cafeteria. Sasuke watched as his best friend openly gawked at Sakura as well as several girls who joined up with her group. Naruto grinned widely but she only nodded at him and smiled softly in recognition. Her smile stopped short, however, when her eyes met his. And for just the briefest few seconds, he was completely taken back by their vibrant green color and intensity; her gaze lingered much more with him. First, her eyelashes fluttered low before rising again. She then slid her hand over her neck and tossed aside some of her hair. And then, the right side of her lips quirked upwards. After that quick exchange, she offered a secret smile before walking out of the cafeteria.

"Did you see that? She was totally checking me out!"

"Hmm."

"Hey, you alright man?"

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"Well, I'll see you later. I have to get to class before Kakashi chews my ass off again."

"Ah."

He finished up his own business quickly before rushing over to his biology class. As soon as he got there, he realized his choices of empty seats. Throughout most of the year, he usually sat next to a male acquaintance or friend. Most of the females were distracted with his presence and made horrible lab partners during class because of it, thus he never repeated the action. Why he decided now of all times to sit by Sakura was unbeknownst to him.

"All right, everyone. Be seated so we can begin class. For the last three weeks, we have gone over the various stages of the lifecycle of the family Felidae including the development of the embryo, the structure of the systems of the body, the development of hunting techniques and social hierarchies as well as interaction between species. The final week marks the final portion of this month's study including the collapse of bodily functions and the reproductive structure which would restart this vicious cycle all over again. Guess which one we're starting with today?"

Sasuke frowned as his biology instructor clasped her hands together.

"Today we'll be going over the mating rituals."

The rest of the class exchanged snickers and wooting while he sighed in agitation. Just when he was starting to get that damn video out of his head.

"Sasuke-kun? Are you okay?"

"A…ah." He had forgotten she was beside him.

"Before we begin our experiment, I brought over a video to watch. In this particular footage, we'll be watching as two members of the species Acinonyx jubatus, better known as the cheetah, perform their mating ritual. It should be noted that unlike the lion and like the tiger, the cheetahs do not remain together after they mate. The male leaves and the female is left to fend for her young on her own. Make note of this and other details in the film as, I assure you, they will appear on your upcoming exam. Now with that said, let's just see how these two creatures go about procreating, shall we?"

As soon as she switched off the light and played the movie, several people began to sleep or interact with their games and phones. Being the good student he was, he took his pen and began to jot some notes down. Sakura was also a studious person and passionate with science; she began her own note system as well.

Sasuke made several detailed recordings including the posture of both cats, every piece of information regarding body language—from the tails to the ears—and the unique way in which they interacted with each other.

The three brothers approach the female boldly, catching the scent of her urine on the tree. When females are in season, they excrete estrogen…

He wrote along the information of the proteins the man was stating in regards to estrogen. It was weird, and it was probably Naruto's fault, but he wondered if human females gave off those same pheromones when they were prime too. It would explain why so many men were attracted to Sakura recently.

Sasuke mentally reprimanded himself over such ridiculous notions. Even so, he couldn't stop but peek over at Sakura who was switching between looking at the screen and writing her notes. He noted how diligently she scribbled, how her long, pink hair fell over her hands as she began writing and the wonderful aroma that her clothes emitted. He wasn't quite sure about pheromones, but whatever scent she rubbed her clothes with smelled pretty damn good.

The three males begin to exhibit their dominance. They circle the female who begins to swipe back, fending off each male. As each of the brothers tries their hand at successfully wooing her, they simultaneously try to thwart one another's progress with nips and growls. It is imperative that they remain diligent to the task as only one will be allowed to mate with the female.

A piece of paper landed on Sasuke's desk and he looked up to see Kiba mouthing words and pointing over to Sakura. Carefully, he unfolded the piece of parchment and read the contents inside. The words were simple and straightforward: Wanna go out with me?

Kiba was still ushering him to pass it down. Instead, he scribbled down a response with handwriting that replicated hers as close as he could. He had photographic memory, and the few moments he did steal from her writing were enough to allow the forgery to be a success. It was evident from Kiba's scowl as he received her supposed response. Sasuke smirked with satisfaction.

He then heard Sakura's phone vibrate. The sound alerted him to another person possbily trying to gain her attention. She concealed the phone under the lab desk and began to read the text. He assumed it was one of her little girlfriends. But when she turned around and looked back at a boy he previously thought to be more intrigued with his own gender, he knew someone else was moving in to stake claim. She began sending her first message back to Sai before his hands moved of their own accord and gently covered hers as well as the phone she was holding. She seemed alarmed by this.

"If you get caught, she'll give you a month's worth of detention and confiscate your phone."

Sakura frowned. "Oh, okay."

While she was too busy looking at him, he slyly punched in a few keywords and hit the reply button. Sai wouldn't be too happy with his choice of words. Sasuke looked back to catch him frown and curse under his breath. Such a gullible idiot.

The eldest brother, Panko, is the victor and claims his prize: the female Athena. He begins the traditional ritual by following the female as she walks away. After a few struggles, she assumes the position as he mounts her to begin copulation. In a matter of seconds, the moment is over and the male has successfully passed on his genes to the next generation of cubs.

The television was cut off sharply after the incident by the professor. "And there you have it folks. I hope this was an informative lesson for you all." She walked over to the lights and switched them on as everyone began to hurriedly put away their electronic devices and wake up from their naps. "Now then, grab your lab books and partner so we can begin the assignment."

"Um, Sasuke-kun…would you be my partner today? Ino is at home sick."

He watched as both Kiba and Sai admitted defeat to this new development. They were both probably trying to get her as a partner in order to confront her with the responses they received. Well, it would be a mess to have such a confrontation in class.

"Ah."

The lab project went rather well, without any public hostility from either male. He decided to focus his attention on the assignment but found that for once, he was the distracted entity and not the girl before him.

"Sasuke-kun, can you please pass me the petri dish?"

"Oh…a-ah."

She accepted it albeit with a small frown at his hesitation. "Is something wrong?"

"No, why would you say that?"

"You seem distracted. You're never distracted. Usually you're so focused with your assignments."

"And how would you know that?"

It was decided then by her body that it was her turn to falter. "Well, I mean, from the few moments I do see you, you're usually reading a book outside on the patio, studying in the library or finishing up an assignment in class…"

His eyebrow further rose which caused her to blush.

"Well, I mean…it's not like I'm stalking you or anything! I just so happen to pass by those places often because I like to study a lot too."

"I know. I see you in the lab often working on your DNA projects."

It was her turn to be suspicious. "Oh? And how would you know that?"

He smirked. "I see you in passing."

His hands reached over to grab the lab book, gently grazing hers in the process. There was a shy exchange on her part before she quickly went about her share of the assignment. And the demeanor didn't change throughout the lab as the two continued to pass subtle hints of engagement. There was a stare here, a touch there; a smile here and smirk there. He absent-mindedly followed her around as she collected equipment for the assignment, helping her carry the items she chose. Even throughout the class, he induldged in her curiosity of him and her endless chatter. And some witty comments and light conversation later, the lab had officially ended. He found it hard to go about his usual routine of retreating into his solitude.

"Thanks, Sasuke-kun. I'll see you around okay?"

"Ah." It was unusually difficult to watch her disappear, something he found unsettling.

After class, he headed to his locker for a change of books. The day was fairly long and he was ready to unwind. His time with Sakura was rather enjoyable and caused him to feel a mixture of anxiety and enthusiasm. It was nothing that a lap around the neighborhood with his dog and some video games couldn't solve—so he assured himself.

"Can you believe she totally blew me off? I mean, just a simple no would have been fine; did she have to be such a damn bitch about it?"

"Ha! I guess I was right all along. Sakura-chan loves me after all!"

He ignored them as they continued to quarrel. If he could trade his current locker position with anyone else in the school, he would.

"Actually, Sakura seemed much more interested in her current lab partner," added Kiba.

"Huh, who was that?"

He ignored the looks Kiba and Naruto were giving him, slamming the locker shut in an attempt to escape.

"No way. You were Sakura-chan's partner?"

"Hmm."

"But you hate teaming up with girls! Why all of a sudden?"

"Uchiha, don't tell me you like her too."

"Don't be ridiculous. I only agreed because of her academic record. I knew she wouldn't waste too much time parading about me like the other girls."

"I don't know; there was quite a bit of interaction between you two."

He glared at Sai whose sudden intrusion was garnering much attention from the people around the locker room. He began to retreat quickly to avoid a confrontation.

"Hey, teme! How dare you flirt with my Sakura-chan!"

"Your Sakura? Hey, I told you all I was interested in her right from the beginning!"

"Like she'd ever be interested in you!"

"Like your relationship with her would even last a week!"

Sasuke shook his head over their childish antics. Using the sudden outburst between the two as an opportunity, he ducked his head and slinked slyly out of view in order to retreat from the area without being detected. He didn't understand why they were arguing over such an ordeal. It wasn't as if anything truly happened between Sakura and him or as if any of the two held any ownership over her. As far as he was aware, Sakura was a single woman without attachment. She never did have a boyfriend throughout high school and they were close to graduating. It was a rather unusual feat since most people at least had one experience of being in a relationship. Not that he was one to judge considering his lack of experience as well. But Sakura to him seemed more of the type to desire such a thing whereas he preferred his solitude and thus lacked the ability to engage in such activities.

He dipped his hand in his pocket, rattling the keys within them to ensure they were still handy. Before exiting the school, however, he noticed Sakura closing her locker door and retrieving her own set of books. She smiled with lowered eyelids before juggling the contents in her hands. Being the polite boy his mother raised him to be, he jogged over to help her steady her books.

"Thank you. I know it's a lot, but I decided to check out more books in the library for my biology project."

"You're starting it already?"

"Of course. I like to get these kinds of things out of the way as soon as possible. Don't you?"

"Well, yes, actually." It was often hard at times to find someone as academic as him.

"I need to get going if I'm to catch my bus. I'll see you in class tomorrow, Sasuke-kun."

"W-wait."

"Yes?"

He rubbed the back of his head at the sudden awkwardness of the situation. "Do you…want me to give you a ride or something?"

"Oh…um, if you don't think it will pose a problem with your schedule…then sure. I'd love a ride."

"Alright."

She snuggled into his passenger seat, books nestled safely in her lap. She seemed to be impressed with his car by her initial fascination with the model and the awed looks she was giving the interior. He inwardly smirked with pride.

"Do you know how to get to Thomas?"

"Two miles past the Underpass?"

"Yes."

He started the ignition and sped off the parking lot. The initial part of the ride was silent. He was used to silence in school, but this was the very first time he spent with her outside of school grounds without a posse of other friends tagging along. It made the ride more uncomfortable without something going on. Initially, he was going to turn on some music but decided not to lest she found his particular choice of genres distasteful.

The sound of a ship leaving port resounded in the air which made her smile. It was also enough to break the ice.

"I love port cities, don't you?"

"They're fine."

"The air is so clean here and there's so much to see. And the best part of it is, of course, the harbor. I love going down to the docks, especially on weekends."

"My friends and I go there all the time."

"Yes, I think I see you there on the weekends, at the Maltani. Do you fancy art then?"

"I admire the craft as a whole, but I personally enjoy photography."

"I love art, but watercolor and acrylics are my specialty. I go to the museum all the time for inspiration for my next piece. My friends come with too. And when we're not looking at art pieces in the Maltani or goofing off on a ferry ride, we usually take a stroll around the area to visit the restaurants. I love visiting cafes and trying something new in the menu each time I go."

"Ever been to the Shelton?"

"Yes, and they have the best steak in town. I love it."

"Yeah, it's pretty good."

The conversation died down again, but she didn't seem at all fazed by it. She was more fascinated with the scenery outside. And as they drove by the underpass, he began to slow down to listen to her instructions until they reached her house.

"Thanks for the ride, Sasuke-kun. I really appreciate it."

"It's fine. No trouble."

He was nervous now. She did that thing with her eyelashes again and he swore her hand purposely held his in a brief reassuring gesture to invoke some type of emotion within him—so he deduced. Her lips pulled up into that familiar sweet smile and she carried a certain air to her. She slid off the seat gracefully, and placed her hand on the door.

"Would you like to come in?"

Any other time, he would have rejected the offer like he did with any other friend; it was simply in his nature to rush back home and continue his studies during the weekdays. But the sway in her hips, the bounce of her body and the swish of her hair had him completely entranced. She walked away from the car in complete confidence of his forthcoming response.

"A-ah," he whispered as he shut the engine off. His body carefully walked right behind her as she silkily glided over to the house. And he followed her.

Numbly, mindlessly and instinctually followed her.

---

"You mean he's not here yet?"

"Not yet."

Naruto threw his books on the dining room table in frustration. "That's not fair. He usually comes straight home. Where is he? I need help with my geometry."

"Naruto, just go upstairs and wait in his room."

"Fine, but hey…come up with me for a second. I have to show you an awesome new video."

"Naruto, I'm busy." Itachi continued to scribble down more notes in his tablet.

"It's two chicks dressed up in Japanese sailor suits going at it."

Itachi immediately closed his book. "I'll log you onto Sasuke's computer."

Naruto waited anxiously as Itachi keyed in his brother's password. As soon as Itachi gave him clearance, he sat down on the chair and began to type in the keywords into the search engine.

"How did you ever come to find this?"

"I was actually looking up the answers to my history homework on Mesopotamia. Somehow, this ended up in the recommendation box when I finished. It's weird."

"You too, huh? If the videos weren't so fucking awesome, I'd actually complain about it. But I am concerned for the younger audience that finds this."

"Yeah, that's freaky. Can you imagine an eight-year old girl that finds this? I'm surprised the parents haven't complained about the feature."

"That's because they're too busy screwing to it."

"Ha! That's what I thought too. Okay, here it goes. It's loading pretty fast so I'll go ahead and play it."

Both boys sat watching the scene play out. Their eyebrows rose midway through the video.

"Wow."

"It's awesome, isn't it?"

"I take it you have a fetish for these types of girls?"

"I'm a seventeen-year old boy. I have a fetish for just about everything."

"I'm glad to see that your generation isn't entirely doomed."

The girls began to gesture each other in provocative ways. It caused both boys to whistle their appreciation over the matter.

"Your brother still not showing signs of being normal?"

"No. And I should know. I live with the guy."

Naruto's eyes bulged over their current position before giving Itachi his attention.

"You mean, you haven't walked in on him jacking off or noticed any stains on his covers? Not even one girl in his room?"

"No. Mother was much stricter with him then she was with me. He was her little angel. As such, she never let him explore deep into the wonders of the opposite gender."

"He really is a momma's boy. Do you think he'll develop some type of weird complex for it?"

"I sure as hell hope not."

"Yeah. But maybe we're counting him out too soon. Some people just develop late, right?"

"I suppose. He might have a chemical imbalance or damaged neurological senses. But even then, most males still fall prey to female persuasion."

"Then, it's official. He's gay."

"Who's gay?"

Naruto was startled by the intrusion and Itachi simply smirked in amusement.

"Oi, teme. Where were you? You walked off while we were talking and didn't say where you were going. And you usually head straight home."

Sasuke scoffed and threw his backpack across the room. "I had an errand to run." Sasuke stole a glance over at the computer and frowned. "What the hell are you watching on my computer?"

"Want me to replay it?"

"If it's more dog porn, I'm not interested, you sick bastard."

"Those were dogs mating. And it's not. This time it's real live humans. Better yet…girl porn. Wanna see?"

"No. Now get out of my room and go home."

"But I need help with geometry!"

"Then get your parents to help you. I'm busy."

"But…"

"Naruto, why don't you wait downstairs? I need to talk to Sasuke first but after that, he'll come down to help you with your homework."

"Awesome. I'll be waiting in the dining room."

His eyes followed Naruto until he disappeared and slammed the door shut behind him. He smiled knowingly at his brother's disheveled appearance. The buttons on his uniform were slightly unaligned with the correct holes, the collar on his shirt was ruffled, and the jacket was already somewhat wrinkled. On top of that, his hair was a bit unkempt and he carried a very distinctive scent—a feminine scent. His eyes met Sasuke's, who scowled instantly at the upcoming barrage.

"All right. Who's the girl?"

"Excuse me?"

"Naruto may be naïve, but I'm not. Who was it?"

"That's none of your business."

"Neither is it the school's in regards to your choice of videos to watch, but it won't matter once they do know that Uchiha Sasuke likes watching dogs going at it."

"Fuck you. And fine. It was Sakura."

He raised an eyebrow. "Isn't that the girl Naruto likes? You did your best friend's girl?"

"It's not like they're dating. Hell, they rarely even exchange words. He has no claim over her."

"No claim? What are you? Some wild animal from the Serengeti?"

"Shut up."

"How did it even happen? I'm sure you two have very minimal contact as it is. How did it go from that to sex?"

"I don't know. It just happened."

"She seduced you, didn't she?"

"Not exactly. I don't…I mean, I don't think so anyway."

"Did you guys do it in the car?"

"No."

"Where then?"

"What's with all the questions? Just back off."

"Dog porn."

"You damn bastard. No. We did it in her room."

"What about her parents?"

"Not home yet."

"Too bad. Would've been an amazing sex story for the future."

"You're sick."

"It's just amusing. My formally asexual little brother just had his first sexual encounter with a female. It's reason for celebration."

"Not a word to anyone."

"They're going to find out eventually."

"Who's going to tell?"

"Well when the next guy fucks her, I'm sure he'll begin to wonder who was there first."

Sasuke furrowed his brows. "They can…tell that?"

"You poor, dumb boy. Yes, they can tell that."

He frowned at the other issue at hand. "What other guys are you talking about?"

"Well, I'm assuming it's probably a hit and run with you. If you're not going to take this further, she'll just move on to the next guy eventually."

His fist tightened.

"I wonder what the next guy will be like? Maybe it'll be Naruto…or that Kiba guy. Will they be in for a surprise when they hear who beat them to the punch."

"Sakura isn't like that."

"Maybe not now, but eventually she'll experiment again. You two will be graduating soon. That's what college is for after all."

"You know, I find it amazing you're still in a relationship. I would have dropped you long ago."

"Good thing we're brothers then. And actually, I found myself in a similar situation before I decided to go steady with my girlfriend."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Thought of other guys fucking her, got pissed and next thing I know we've been going out for two years."

"Hmm."

"So what are you going to do?"

"Nothing that concerns you."

"Fair enough. But as your elder brother, it is my responsibility to ensure that the situation is under control as your actions would inadvertently affect the entire family."

"What are you going on about now?"

"Sasuke, answer me this. Did you use a condom?"

A faint scowl soon became a faint frown. His eyebrows rose subsequently and his eyes reflected the sheer horror of a ghost that had suddenly possessed his being for his body had taken on a rather sickly hue. His brother's smirk became evident as the transition progressed along.

"And thus the male successfully passes on his genes to the next generation of children."