Noises from the Bedroom

Author's Notes: Just me and my 'innocent' ideas, and the most innocent Sakura I've ever heard of! Thoughts will be like this: /blah/ Erm... Since someone asked whether this is a one-shot, here's my answer: Yes it is. Reviews please!

Disclaimer: I do not own the anime series Naruto in any way... as much as I wish it was mine. ;; sighs

Warnings: The beginning of this fic may make a person's mind wander off to the gutter... Hehe.. + snickers

Pairings: Up to your imagination.. evil grin

Noises in the Bedroom
Author: Kuroi Hikari

THUMP! THUMP! Noises were coming from the ceiling where Haruno Sakura was reading her shoujo manga. "Sasuke!" came a muffled voice that followed the thumps. Sakura looked up at the ceiling and started to worry. /What's going on up there?! I hope Sasuke and Naruto aren't trying to kill each other! I should get Kakashi-sensei.. just in case../ She scrambled out of the chair she was sitting in, and ran up the stairs of the house. Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura were currently spending their weekend at Kakashi's house for some R&R.(1)

THUMP! Sakura paused infront of the door to the room Naruto and Sasuke shared. The door was closed. She pressed her ear to the door and froze. All she heard was heavy breathing. /Ah! They really must be trying to kill each other! What if one of them succeeded?! They're so quiet!/ Her eyes widened as her brain supplied her with a mental image of Sasuke standing over Naruto's dead body.

"KAKASHI-SENSEI!!" yelled Sakura as she swung open the door to Kakashi's bedroom. A very surprised Iruka looked up from the spot where he was reading a newspaper, while Kakashi quickly hid his book under a cushion. Sakura had caught a glimpse of the title of the book of what Kakashi was reading. It said 'Babes in Paradise' and had a picture of a woman wearing very skimpy clothing. One of Sakura's eyebrows twitched for a few seconds before she recomposed herself. "Kakashi-sensei! Come quickly! I think Naruto and Sasuke are trying to kill each other!" Sakura led Kakashi and Iruka to the room Sasuke and Naruto shared.

"Owww!! Could you be a little gentler?!" came Naruto's voice through the door.
"Stay still and stop squirming, dobe!" came Sasuke's reply, and a series of grunts and straining sounds followed.

Iruka blushed at this, while Kakashi looked amused. Sakura's mouth hung open in shock. /MASAKA! No way! Nonono.. Sasuke and Naruto would never.. Noooooo!/ Well, at least no she knew those two weren't trying to kill each other..

THUMP! THUMP! THUMP! "Saaasukeee! Hit it harder! Hit it harder!" shouted Naruto. THUMP! "AH!" yelped Naruto, while Sasuke let out what sounded like a sigh of relief. Then, everything in the room went silent. Outside, Kakashi, Iruka, and Sakura had their ears pressed to the door, listening tentatively.

"Naruto, you're so noisy." came Sasuke's voice. Then the moaning and straining sounds started again. Sakura and Iruka's faces turned beet red. Kakashi shook his head and smiled. He was about to walk away, when suddenly.. "SHIT!" Sasuke swore. Kakashi froze.

"W-What's the matter, Sasuke?" Naruto sounded worried. There was a long pause. Then...

"I think I'm stuck." Sasuke said in disbelief.

"WHAAAT?!" yelled a frustrated Naruto, and a string of curses came from both Naruto and Sasuke, accompanied by frequent yelps of pain from Naruto. Outside the room, Iruka's eyes widened and stared at Kakashi incredulously. Sakura looked like she was ready to faint. Kakashi looked slightly dazed, but quickly snapped out of it. He knocked on the door.

"Is everything alright in there?" Kakashi asked loudly.

"YES!" yelled a panicked Naruto.

"NO!" Sasuke yelled at the same time, and an argument between the two ensued. Kakashi quickly took a lock pick out of his pocket and picked the lock on the door. He swung the door open and stepped into the room, with Sakura and Iruka right behind him. All three stopped in front of the washroom door that was wide open.

The sight that greeted the three ninjas was a sight they would all remember for the rest of their lives. The washroom was a mess. Shampoo bottles were knocked all over the place. What was most amusing was that Naruto was sitting on the toilet seat with his pants down to his knees. A towel covered his private part. Sasuke was fully dressed, but he was on his knees in front of Naruto. Sakura fainted. Kakashi and Iruka just stared.

"We can explain!" exclaimed Naruto and Sasuke simultaneously. The two of them immediately tried to explain at the same time.

"Naruto wanted to pull a prank on me, but his plan backfired."

"Sasuke was suppose to fall for it!"

"He super glued the toilet seat."

"He was suppose to sit on it!"

"But he slipped and fell."

"That wasn't part of my plan!"

"So now he's glued to the toilet seat."

Kakashi shoulders started to shake with suppressed laughter while Iruka rolled his eyes and sighed. "So what was all the thumping and yelling all about?" Iruka questioned. Again, Naruto and Sasuke tried to answer at the same time.

"While Naruto was stuck to the toilet seat,"

"This HUGE ugly cockroach came out of nowhere! And-"

"He told me to kill it."

"Sasuke used MY shoe to hit it, and he kept missing!"

"Naruto kept shrieking at me to hit the damned cockroach harder, so I did."

"HE was doing all the thumping!"

"The dobe actually screamed when I finally hit it."

"Then, he tried to help me off the toilet seat."

"Naruto, you should have known superglue is really strong."

"It hurts! Iruka-sensei! My skin is glued to the toilet seat! Sasuke was pulling me so hard too!"

"Unfortunately, I got some of the glue on my hands."

"So now his hands are stuck to the sides of the toilet!"

"It's not funny."

By now, both Iruka and Kakashi were both laughing openly with Sasuke and Naruto glaring daggers at them. After finally getting his laughter under control, Kakashi performed the 'ansutaku no jutsu'(2) and freed the two distressed boys. Later, Sakura finally woke up, and the whole incident was explained to her by a still laughing Iruka. Afterwards, Sakura laughed so hard, she vowed she'd never let Naruto live it down. Of course, she spared Sasuke. Out of kindness? Nah...

A/N: (1) That's a sucky way to spend your weekend. sweatdrops (2)Hehe. I made that one up. if you read 'ansutaku' as japlish, you'd get 'unstuck'... REVIEW PLEASE!!