Author : ChibiCHICKENluver
"But Sai, think about it! You don't find it the least bit weird?"
Cerulean eyes stared straight into much darker, brown ones, as the owner gave a pouty look. He ran a tan hand through his spiky blonde hair. The other person, Sai, shook his head.
"Dickless, Sasuke-kun's consumption of tomatoes aren't any of our…concern." He nodded matter-of-factly.
Naruto rolled his eyes. "The guy eats like…3 bushels a day at the minimum. Something's not right with that!"
Sai's eyebrows furrowed slightly. "Speaking of Sasuke-kun…shouldn't he be here? He is usually not one to be late for our strenuous training activities. And Ugly is late as well…"
Naruto's tone turned defensive and hurt. His eyes got big and his mouth opened to a small frown. "Don't call Sakura-chan ugly! She's beautiful."
Sai tilted his head to the side. "But aren't you betrothed to Hinata-san?"
Naruto nodded. "Yes, but Sakura was my first true love…no one can replace her."
Sai was silent for a moment, and then opened his mouth to speak. "Naruto-san…don't you find it a bit of an oddity that Ugly doesn't have a partner? I mean…a girl her age should, shouldn't she?"
Naruto gave Sai a blank look. "Sai…Sakura-chan is 17. It's rare if kunoichi have boyfriends, let alone get married." He gave an annoyed huff. "Besides, she just got over that Uchiha. It will take her some time to get dating again."
Sai's eyes widened slightly. "Sasuke-kun and Ugly were…together?"
Naruto shook his head feverishly. "No, nothing like that. It was more one-sided if anything."
As if summoned, both teenagers heard the familiar sound of shoes pounding against the floor of the bridge, and they turned to see Sakura, running up to them.
"Hey!" She panted out, gripping the railing with one hand and bracing herself on her leg with the other as she fought to catch her breath.
Naruto looked her up and down, one blonde eyebrow raised. "What happened to you?" He asked while she straightened out, running her nimble fingers through her long pink hair. She brushed a strand of hair behind her ear and exhaled loudly.
"Sorry I'm late, but I won't be able to go to training today."
"Why Ugly?" Sai asked, mimicking Naruto's eyebrow movements.
Sakura gave him a quick glare and turned back to Naruto. "I've got a doctors appointment…" Naruto looked confused. "But…you're a medic nin…why do you need a doctor?"
A look of concern washed over his features, and he reached out to touch her. "Are you alright?"
Sakura nodded enthusiastically. "Yeah, I'm fine! It's just a check up. Tsunade-sama wanted me to go to someone else to make sure I was really going. She's under the strange impression that I," she used air quotations for emphasis. "'Put myself last.'"
Naruto chuckled under his breath and shook his head. "Now where would she ever get that impression?"
Sakura smiled. "Right? Well, I'd appreciate if you told Kakashi that I can't come to training today…" Naruto grinned. "Of course."
Sakura turned to leave, but stopped when she felt a hand on her wrist. She stared at Sai's hand, and then her gaze traveled to his expressionless face. "Is Sasuke-kun not coming to training today either?"
Sakura's face was stoic as she mumbled a quiet reply. "I think Uchiha is sick."
Then she was gone in a puff of smoke, and Naruto looked at Sai smugly. "You see that? If you had asked her 5 years ago, she would have been drooling with hearts in her eyes at just the thought of Sasuke."
"Dickless…why do people fall 'out of love'?"
Naruto sighed. "I'll tell you if you stop calling me dickless…"
Two weeks later…
Naruto looked around the empty training grounds, save for Sai and Kakashi, and frowned. "This is the 5th day in 2 weeks that Uchiha and Sakura-chan have missed training! They never miss training! Sasuke didn't seem that sick yesterday…"
Kakashi looked up from his ever-present porn and shrugged. "His face was red all day yesterday. He must have had a fever. But you have to remember, Sasuke's never been one to complain." He looked back down and giggled like a school girl.
Naruto pouted. "Well…then where's Sakura-chan? She never misses training…"
Kakashi sighed when he was forced to turn his attention away from his book. "Sakura is on a solo-mission. Just don't worry about it and do one-on-one for now." He waved them off onto the training ground, Naruto grumbling to himself.
"Sasuke's got a fever, my ass! I bet he's sitting in the Uchiha Manor, watching TV, eating like a pig and laughing at the thought of us having to train while he does nothing!"
Sai gave Naruto a confused look. "Dickless, Sasuke-kun does not 'eat like a pig'. Sasuke-kun takes his health to the utmost importance…does he not?"
Naruto glared at Sai, and continued ranting, kicking a rock under his foot. "And poor Sakura, on a mission all by herself…I hope she'll be alright!"
Sai nodded in agreement. "Me too. It would be unfortunate to be on a team without a med-nin…right?"
Naruto gave Sai a look that said, 'are-you-fucking-joking?' "Sai, that is not the main concern. If Sakura were to die, I would die. Sakura-chan is very special to me!"
Naruto turned to Kakashi, who was blushing, nose buried in his book. "Kakashi-sensei…when is Sakura supposed to come back from her mission?"
Kakashi looked up again, uninterestedly. "Hm? Oh. Sakura should be back in a few hours. She just needed to return a borrowed scroll to SUNA."
Naruto got close to Sai's face, and whispered. "Or, maybe her and Sasuke are both watching TV, laughing their asses off at us!" Without waiting for Sai's reply, he jumped back and began pacing. "Why else would they both be out on the same exact day, every time?"
Sai's eyes widened. "Maybe they are plotting the downfall of Konoha!"
Naruto gave Sai a skeptical look. "Sakura's parents live here, and Sakura-chan loves her parents, and Sasuke could have done that while he was a missing nin." He turned on his heels, stretching his arms behind his head.
"So it's settled. We'll visit Uchiha's and Sakura's house, and we'll expose them for the lazy frauds they are!" He gave an annoyed glance in Kakashi's direction. "But how do we get passed the old man?"
"Kakashi-kun!" Sai called, waving his hand around. Kakashi gave a loud, frustrated sigh. "What!"
With a fake smile, Sai pranced up to him. "Dickless and I will be heading to Uchiha-san's house, to wish him good health, if that's okay with you!"
Kakashi rolled his visible eye, grunted a 'whatever', and continued reading. By the time he looked up again, Naruto and Sai we're gone.
"Okay Sai. So we'll hit Sakura-chan's apartment first, and then Sasuke's. If they're both gone, or if Sakura-chan is gone and Uchiha is sleeping, then they both told the truth and they've been really busy and we'll let them off the hook." He frowned. "But if they're watching TV, there will be hell to pay!"
Both boys dashed down the bustling street, dodging people and darting in and out of alleyways. They had to stop once or twice to regain their composure, but it wasn't 10 minutes later when they reached their first destination.
"Okay, Sakura lives on the top floor so we'll just go onto the roof and work our way down."
Once on the roof, Naruto focused his chakra into his feet, and calmly scaled down the building, barking at Sai to keep watch for anyone who might have a problem with them.
While he was inching downward, he was reminded of a much simpler time in the Land hidden by the Mist, where he, Sakura and Sasuke spent hours trying to climb those damn trees.
He had loved them both so much back then. Before Sasuke left the village, and before they had to go looking for him.
He shook the thought out of his head when he stood directly above the window he recognized as Sakura's living room window.
He stepped onto the window sill with a 'tap' and crouched down to peer inside. It was neat and clean, with nothing out of place. Feeling adventurous, he reached down to grip the window pane, and pulled it upwards.
He was shocked to find that it easily slid open. He was sure Sakura was more careful to keep her windows locked when she was away.
Clue number one, he thought to himself. Sakura would have locked her windows if she were really on a mission.
He climbed inside after signaling to Sai that he was going in.
Sakura sure was a hell of a lot cleaner than he was. After scoping out the kitchen, dining room, and living room, he made his way down the hall, poking his head in rooms as he passed, making sure Sakura wasn't in any of them.
He opened her bedroom door just a crack, before poking his head inside.
"Damn," Naruto said aloud. "She might keep the front of her house clean, but her room is a mess!" He carefully stepped over miscellaneous magazines and CD's, but his foot caught on a shirt, and he landed face first onto her bed.
He groaned when his face came in contact with something that wasn't a soft, over-cushioned pillow. He lifted his head up, and his eyebrows rose along with his interest.
Sakura's cell phone.
He flipped it open casually, and scrolled through her messages. They were all from her mother, Tsunade, Ino and Shikamaru.
He looked through her pictures. A cat, a flower, her and Ino in front of a mirror in dresses in a changing room, another cat– Damn Sakura was boring.
He put her cell phone down, and checked her bathroom, before climbing back out the window, and up the building, where Sai was impatiently waiting.
"Well?" He asked, tapping his foot. "Is Ugly there or not?"
Naruto shook his head. "Nope, but that doesn't mean that Sasuke isn't! To the Uchiha Manor!"
The Uchiha Manor was quiet—a little too quiet for Naruto's liking.
"This is very suspicious." He told Sai, sliding along Sasuke's front porch. He looked up at the balcony that attached the Sasuke's room. "Alright Sai, I'll look in the living room and make my way up to Sasuke's bedroom. You go around back."
Sai nodded and took off to the other side of the house.
Naruto found that Sasuke's place was just about as clean as Sakura's, minus the bowl of tomatoes lying on the kitchen counter. Naruto knew Sasuke had a tomato problem.
He looked in every room, like he had in Sakura's house; even if there were much more rooms in Sasuke's.
He tip-toed upstairs, cursing quietly at the way one of them creaked. He decided to climb up the banister. It made the task of getting upstairs much more difficult, but it made less noise.
The first place he headed to was Sasuke's bedroom. It was only a short distance from the landing, and it made the most sense to Naruto to check there first.
He slid along the wall, being sure not to bump into any pictures hanging. Then he noticed a picture already torn off the wall.
It looked recent.
He looked down at the picture and frowned. It was their team seven picture. With Naruto looking annoyed at Sasuke, who looked irritated about Sakura drooling over him. And Kakashi faked a smile, but when you were a Kakashi expert like Naruto, you could tell he was itching to get back to his porn.
He smiled softly. The good old days.
He reminded himself of the task at hand, and looked at Sasuke's door, which was already open a crack.
He peered inside, taking in the clothes strewn about. He passed over them like it was nothing, and then did a double take when his eyes wavered passed a tan medic skirt, followed by a lacy pink bra. A red shirt soon followed, and then a lacy pink thong.
They all led to Sasuke's bed, where Naruto couldn't believe his eyes.
Sasuke—who was naked, was on top of Sakura—who was also naked, and arching her head back, and moaning, and doing all these things Naruto could only describe as the main reason for his sensory overload.
And probably his heart attack.
He watched in sick fascination as Sasuke brought his head down to bite Sakura's neck. In turn, Sakura clawed at Sasuke's back, leaving angry, red scratches.
Sasuke gripped her thighs and sat up, taking Sakura with him. She bounced on his lap, arms wrapping around Sasuke's neck.
Sakura complied, slamming down onto Sasuke's dick harder and faster each time. Sasuke groaned loudly, and placed his hands on her waist, lifting her up to slam her back down.
He rushed off of the bed, Sakura still on him when he stood up. He pounded into her once her soon-to-be bruised back found his bedroom wall.
"Ahh…fuck me Sasuke…yeahhh, harder!"
Sakura's voice hitched with every slam of their bodies, but it didn't stop Sasuke from giving a rough, animalistic pace.
Sasuke bit Sakura's lip hard, and Naruto saw blood trickle down Sakura's chin, only to be lapped up by Sasuke a second later.
Naruto also noticed that Sakura's moaning got louder, and higher pitched, and Sasuke's low grunts and groans, were becoming closer together until they were a long stream of unabashed, heavy moans and encouragements for Sakura.
"Come on Sakura," Sakura panted through gritted teeth. A moan escaped his throat before he could continue. "Come for me."
In any other circumstance, Naruto was sure that Sakura would have beaten the shit out of any guy that used that demanding tone with her, but Sakura, in response, wrapped her legs around Sasuke's waist, causing him to go into her deeper.
"Sasuke…" Sakura moaned loudly, biting her own lip. She grabbed onto Sasuke's arms, digging her nails into them. "Sasuke…I'm gunna—"
Her voiced thought was interrupted when Sasuke captured her lips with his, and gave a few quick, panicky thrusts before Sakura moaned so loud Naruto though his ears were going to bleed.
Sasuke's thrusts became more frantic, and as he came, he muttered Sakura's name quietly, into the crook of her neck.
He gave a few lazy thrusts, before stopping his movements all together.
The only thing Naruto could hear was Sasuke's heavy breathing mixed with Sakura's quiet murmurs, and his own heart beating in his ears.
"So Naruto," Sai's voice came from behind. Naruto whipped around and clamped his hand over Sai's mouth. "Shh! Sasuke's sleeping!"
They hurried out of the house, and once on the street, Sai smiled.
"So I guess Uchiha-san was sick after all!"